Couples Therapy in Vienna – Diana Tutschek Marriage Counselling

Couples Therapy in Vienna and Online (Worldwide, in English) to Resolve Conflict, Improve Communication and Connection and Rebuild Trust

I am a licensed psychological counsellor (GISA Nr. 36779604) offering couples therapy in Vienna at Diana Tutschek Paartherapie on Stumpergasse 48, 1060 Wien, as well as online marriage counselling internationally (in English). My work aims to help clients address marital challenges, understand the causes of distress and resolve relationship crises. I received my professional qualifications in the UK (King’s College London), Austria (Universität Wien and Österreichische Akademie für Psychologie) and the USA (Institute of Dr Shapiro).

What problems can couples counselling help you solve?

Through the relationship treatment course, you can achieve various goals, including:

• improving marital communication and problem-solving,
• improving intimacy,
• navigating cultural differences,
• working on better parenting,
• gaining clarity on whether continuing the relationship is the right path forward.

In addition, couples interventions often focus on

• coping with jealousy,
• overcoming infidelity,
• rebuilding trust,
• finding an optimal solution for a relationship crisis (whether it is a decision to continue or terminate the relationship).

How Couples Therapy or Marriage Counselling Works at Diana Tutschek Paartherapie, in Vienna and Online

I tend to suggest that partners decide for themselves how they would prefer to start. This may be in a joint session or individually. If we begin with a joint meeting, I often find it useful to have an individual chat with each partner as a next step. The individual sessions are typically followed by another joint meeting, where I offer feedback and recommendations.

I do not have rules for how couples therapy must be, and whether it should be in person at my practice Diana Tutschek Paartherapie 1060 Wien or online. Based on both research evidence and my long-term experience as a therapist, the outcome of relationship treatment does not depend on its setting, whether it takes place remotely or in the clinic. What it depends on is our rapport (the connection we build), my competence in addressing your specific issue, your motivation, your belief in your own capacity and consistent engagement. Besides that, it is crucial that I, as a counsellor, remain non-judgmental. The process can be very challenging for both partners, and it’s my role to provide a supportive and neutral space throughout.

Fees

The counselling fee ranges from 70 to 120 euros per session. It depends on the chosen duration (60 or 90 minutes) and whether the session is individual or joint, online or in-person. After receiving an enquiry, I usually respond within a few hours, clarifying the cost and suggesting several time options for a first meeting. The initial phase of a relationship therapy course typically comprises four sessions. Usually, this is sufficient for crisis intervention and gaining insights, but I may recommend continuing for more sustainable results.

The Importance of Addressing Marital Conflicts

The marriage-health link can manifest in both beneficial and detrimental ways. Evidence extensively supports the positive physical and psychological health benefits of marriage. However, it is crucial to understand how distressed relationships can lead to a decline in both physical and mental well-being. A large body of research reveals that, besides deteriorating physical health, higher levels of marital conflict are associated with a notable increase in symptoms of anxiety, depression and other psychiatric conditions in dyadic relationships in Austria and worldwide. Thus, adequately addressing and resolving dyadic issues may prevent or markedly minimise their damaging effects on mental and physical health.

What are the Signs You Need Couples Counselling?

Relationship interventions may benefit you in the following situations:

• pathological jealousy, which is persistent and obsessive and leads to accusations or control,
• problem-solving and communication issues, which trigger misunderstandings and fights,
• an extradyadic affair (infidelity), resulting in a loss of trust,
• a lack of intimacy, which leads to disconnection,
• increased severity or frequency of non-specific quarrels,
• a specific matter (e.g., disagreeing about your children’s education),
• considering divorce after all attempts to improve the relationship have been exhausted.

Different problems require different approaches. There is no universal one-size-fits-all method.

Feeling Trapped in Marriage: Finding a Way Forward

Moreover, it is also common for the partners to feel trapped in their relationship. They seek couples therapy, in person in Vienna or online, as an ultimate attempt at resolution before initiating divorce or separation.

Counselling in Vienna for Cultural or Other Individual Differences

Furthermore, major life transitions and individual differences can motivate partners to seek relationship treatment. Among these differences are cultural aspects, socioeconomic background, age, temperament, personality traits, education, gender, capabilities/disabilities or anything else that distinguishes among people. Cultural differences are often among the reasons multicultural spouses have marriage counselling or couples therapy in Vienna. Below are a few examples:

• A frequent challenge for international couples is asymmetric integration. This may happen when one partner is consumed by a high-pressure role, while the other struggles to find their footing in a German-speaking environment.
• Many intercultural couples living in Austria use English as a “bridge language.” In this context, subtle cultural differences, such as varying degrees of expressiveness, may be misinterpreted as a lack of affection or respect.

Employing Cognitive Behaviour Therapy Principles to Address Infidelity and Jealousy at Paartherapie 1060 Wien

Infidelity can be heartbreaking for both the injured and participating partner. Affair counselling typically involves cognitive behavioural therapy and person-centred principles. In addition, I may incorporate EMDR principles, as infidelity usually results in high distress for one or both partners. The treatment comprises several phases, starting with understanding immediate effects following the affair, such as depression, dependencies, anxiety or trauma. Therefore,

We then work on establishing boundaries and learning techniques for managing emotions to facilitate constructive communication. Finally, we analyse all contributing factors that led to the affair. This part is hardest for the injured partner, as it may feel like justifying the infidelity. Ultimately, we will have to decide on the next steps together. Sometimes, the best consideration may be to take separate paths moving forward. Or we may choose to continue therapy to work on reestablishing trust and connection. The core phase of infidelity counselling in Vienna or online typically comprises 4–10 sessions.

Jealousy treatment typically involves CBT techniques, including those addressing low self-esteem and self-confidence. I may also employ person-centred and some psychodynamic methods. First of all, we need to understand what jealousy is based on and whether it is retroactive or not. I elaborate on this type of preoccupation in my article How to Overcome an Obsession with Your Partner’s Past. Pathological jealousy may be associated with mental health conditions such as obsessive-compulsive disorder or anxiety. In addition, it may be related to personality conditions, including those involving certain exaggerated traits. The duration of the jealousy treatment course is usually around 4–8 sessions.

Individual Therapy for Mental Health Issues Amid Marital Discord

Relationship conflict can cause each partner to seek individual therapy in Vienna or online. It is possible that one or both partners do not attribute their current difficulties solely to marital issues. Thus, marriage problems can lead to initiating treatment for a mental health condition, such as depression, psychological trauma and various types of anxiety disorders. Or, similarly, addressing a condition may be a necessary step in resolving marital distress. I elaborate on one example in my Psychology Today piece, ADHD in Relationships.

Any mental health condition in one or both partners should be addressed individually, either in parallel with or before engaging in treatment together.

Integrative Marriage Counsellor Diana Tutschek: My Approach to Treating Dyadic Distress

As an integrative couples therapist, I utilise a variety of approaches to address relationship issues. My choice of strategy sometimes depends on whether I meet clients on-site at Paartherapie 1060 Wien or deliver the international couples therapy course remotely (in English). In both cases, I am considerably influenced by cognitive-behavioural, family systems, Gottman’s, emotionally-focused and EMDR theories. I am trained in CBT-based couples counselling through a British Psychological Society-approved course, and in EMDR skills applied in relationship therapy through EMDRIA training in the USA.

My individually tailored couples therapy (in person in Vienna or online) aims to enhance communication and problem-solving skills, improve intimacy, reform dysfunctional thinking patterns and find ways to avoid unhelpful conflict escalation. Furthermore, in marriage therapy, we work on strengthening the emotional connection between partners and forming new interactions that foster a secure attachment. Alternatively, we may address marital conflicts by exploring whether partners would benefit from taking separate paths.

EFT Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy in Vienna to Improve Communication and Intimacy

To address intimacy and emotional connection issues, I found Gottman’s techniques and EFT particularly beneficial. Both Gottman’s exercises and emotionally focused techniques target ”disconnection” and a lack of empathy. Both are shown to be effective in the long term. I employ EFT to address depressed or frustrated marriages, which involve a persistent feeling of sadness, hopelessness and dissatisfaction that may also be non-specific.

In emotionally focused therapy, I use unified detachment, empathic joinment and other techniques to tackle relationship issues. Distressed partners usually have limited, if any, pleasant and rewarding interactions but many blaming, demanding, gruelling or angry ones. Thus, reciprocated negative behaviour is often a focal pattern of interactions in troubled couples I meet in Vienna. If one partner behaves negatively, the other partner is unlikely to be kind. This leads to a sequence of intensifying negative behaviours. Such negative interactions in a couple having marital difficulties often begin with one partner expecting to be criticised for something. Thus, the main components of the initial argument are a negative expectation of one partner and reciprocated destructive exchanges (escalating criticism).

In addition, distressed partners are reactive. Positive or negative situations potently influence how the partners feel about or assess their bond at any given time. Since the partners are so used to be criticised, they may stop attending sensibly to one another. Instead, they plan a counter-attack on the primary (expected or perceived) criticism.

Addressing Frustration and Lack of Appreciation

Lacking the ability to handle disagreements is one more characteristic of a dysfunctional relationship. The inability to manage conflicts and problem-solve leaves partners with a surplus of frustrations and fights. Moreover, it may be accompanied by reinforcement erosion, which can be attributed to habituation, where once-pleasurable interactions become insignificant or boring over time. Spouses may be unable to appreciate each other’s efforts and start taking each other for granted. Additionally, they may have new needs that their spouses have not yet managed to meet. One or both partners may have stopped doing pleasurable things that previously maintained warm emotions.

All of the mentioned factors contribute to destructive patterns of disputes, criticism and neglect, reinforcing negative beliefs and expectations of the partner and the relationship and hence generating various conflicts we address in couples therapy in Vienna or online.

Relationship Patterns That Predict Divorce or Dyadic Relationship Breakdown

Scott and colleagues identified the following factors as major reasons for separation:

• Commitment Issues 94%
• Extradyadic Affairs (Cheating) 89%
• Excessive Conflict and Arguing 72%
• Marrying Too Young 61%
• Financial Difficulties 56%

In addition, John Gottman’s research aimed to establish patterns that may predict growing apart. He found that four factors, which he called the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, are the strongest predictors of divorce, even over extended periods (up to 14 years). These are:

• criticism,
• contempt,
• defensiveness,
• stonewalling.

I have presented each Horseman in short YouTube videos. Interestingly, criticism has been studied by researchers and clinicians more than the other horsemen. Essential issues that may result from criticism in a dyadic relationship are defensiveness and emotional distancing, key factors in the breakdown of marriages.

Therefore, learning to problem-solve, communicate your feelings and thoughts without blame, and approach issues as common (dyadic) challenges is crucial for maintaining a functional and mutually rewarding connection. Moreover, it’s important to master skills such as appreciation and empathy, and, importantly, learn how to express them. In our couples therapy course in Vienna, we will work on gradually building them. These skills will inevitably lead to improvements in a relationship.

Divorce Counselling in 1060 Vienna or Online

In some circumstances, separation considerations are strongly present, whether or not a final decision has been taken. Sometimes, an individual may find themselves living in two realities as they reflect on whether to stay in a relationship or leave. Opposing internal forces may involve factors such as children, finances, logistical challenges, reputation concerns and more. In divorce counselling sessions in Vienna, we do not aim to reach an explicit decision for or against preserving a relationship. Rather, we focus on achieving clarity and confidence. I discuss the complexity of the decision to separate or not in my article published by Psychology Today.

Can relationship therapy help build or rebuild happiness?

The treatment course aims to transform the distressed lives of dyadic partners into healthier and more fulfilling ones. However, while we aim at ”counselling for a better life”, the “better life” depends on the direction the partners choose. If they agree to move forward together, they can achieve this transformation through de-escalation and nurturing secure communication. It sounds simple; yet, to attain these goals, partners would have to address many individual, internal matters first. Importantly, meaningful outcomes require time and commitment.

How to Book Couples Counselling at Diana Tutschek Paartherapie Wien or Online (Worldwide, in English)

To enquire about or schedule an individual or joint session, contact the relationship therapist at diana@betterlifepsychologist.com, via her verified profile Diana Tutschek on Psychology Today Austria or Psychology Today International,

or simply use this booking form.

Couples Therapy Vienna FAQ

Diana Tutschek Paartherapie Wien: How To…

Check my answers to relationship how-tos.

How to Know if Your Marriage Has a Chance to Be Saved

1. To understand whether counselling or therapy can help you save your relationship:
   

   Are YOU willing to save the relationship?
   Are you willing TO WORK on saving it?
   Do you still see GOOD things in your partner?
   Does your partner ALSO want to save the relationship, give it a try, and do the work?
   
   Ideally, the answer to all of these should be yes.

2. How to restore a relationship after an affair?
   

   1. Transparency and Honesty
   The participating partner (the one who cheated) must consistently demonstrate trustworthy behaviour and reliability, which may include voluntarily sharing information about themselves, such as phone activity, location or daily routines.
   2. Active but Balanced Monitoring
   The betrayed partner may temporarily monitor the actions of their partner to rebuild safety and not escalate mistrust.
   3. Remorse and Accountability
   The participating partner must express genuine remorse and take full responsibility.
   4. Reconnection
   Spending quality time together, improving communication and intimacy.
   5. Exploration of the Affair and Transparent Explanation
   Exploring relationship vulnerabilities that contributed to the betrayal (it is better to do this with the help of a professional couples counsellor). The participating partner should explain the underlying reasons, but not in the form of a justification.